You were to abolish war, but were to make converts by making war upon them, and charging them with loving war as the apple of their eye. You were to abolish military force, but you were first to bring all commanding officers who had done their duty, to trial by court-martial for that offence, and shoot them. Though it was not literally true, as was facetiously charged against him by public unbelievers, that he called aloud to his fellow-creatures: ‘Curse your souls and bodies, come here and be blessed!’ still his philanthropy was of that gunpowderous sort that the difference between it and animosity was hard to determine. Honeythunder expanded into an inflammatory Wen in Minor Canon Corner. Always something in the nature of a Boil upon the face of society, Mr. Crisparkle had need of her own share of philanthropy when she beheld this very large and very loud excrescence on the little party.
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